Quoting Raphaella:

The storm appeared on the distant horizon but two months ago, a swirl of possibilities shaded in hues of dapped greys with the slightest flecks of indigo haze.  Seated at a distance I stared into the eyes of the oracle after bringing to him a list of conditions held over several years that others before him had misread, their desire in such perhaps to make the situation simpler or just brush me away so that another might come to the shrine of knowledge for there were always many pilgrims.  Yet the temple was on a different continent, and perhaps indeed it was why the reading became more clearer for it was once called home and the people went about things differently.

Yet as many a traveller often finds when reaching their destination, the view was not as breathtaking as hoped and if anything revealed only more paths winding away with the knowledge of weary steps soon to tread.  Time stopped, surprise and shock building and a sudden burden felt of disillusionment and confusion, because the final answer he could not offer and like a tarot reader only formed more questions to roll off the tip of my tongue in an attempt to soothe myself.

Outside I stepped, from silence into the bustle of those who had come with me, a smile of ease forged onto my lips that attempted to offer them what they wished.  Yet it was a brittle thing, cracks soon enough appearing in the traitorous voice that attempted to soften the croak that came.  I could not look in their eyes now for the pity and sadness that reflected in them, and worse came such inner self-contempt and unworthiness that I could find no comfort in the embraces of word or touch offered.

What was to be two weeks of relaxation and rekindling family ties turned into a nervous day-to-day approximation of whether once returned from where I had come that the other oracles would continue where this one had guided me.  Worse I fear was how I came to view my companion who had travelled to the other side of the world for adventure and exploration, for I could feel nothing more now other then shame and insecurity where even the briefest touch or word of encouragement had my stomach twisting and eyes swell with tears.

A cold chill settled within, whispering with it the knowledge and acceptance that I needed to face the path ahead alone and feared so greatly in hurting him.  However with the uncertainties around the condition why impose problems onto him when he had so much more to do, and when by this stage I feared that my actions, the distance I desired so greatly would have him hurt by rejection.  So I ended it yet took solace in the fact he desired to remain friends and understood my reasoning's.

It has taken this long waiting, watching the storm gather closer and loom always on the edge of sight and never from mind.  Words, fluid and paper crosses hands, yet never the single golden coined response desired from the gypsies that deem I wait another two weeks after the two months it has taken to get to this point in the ridge with the peak standing mockingly out of reach.

I thought myself a patient person until this moment, but there are only so many shrines, so many oracles and so many words that can be used before you just want to hide from them all.

The storm appeared on the distant horizon but two months ago, a swirl of possibilities shaded in hues of dapped greys with the slightest flecks of indigo haze.  Seated at a distance I stared into the eyes of the oracle after bringing to him a list of conditions held over several years that others before him had misread, their desire in such perhaps to make the situation simpler or just brush me away so that another might come to the shrine of knowledge for there were always many pilgrims.  Yet the temple was on a different continent, and perhaps indeed it was why the reading became more clearer for it was once called home and the people went about things differently.

Yet as many a traveller often finds when reaching their destination, the view was not as breathtaking as hoped and if anything revealed only more paths winding away with the knowledge of weary steps soon to tread.  Time stopped, surprise and shock building and a sudden burden felt of disillusionment and confusion, because the final answer he could not offer and like a tarot reader only formed more questions to roll off the tip of my tongue in an attempt to soothe myself.

Outside I stepped, from silence into the bustle of those who had come with me, a smile of ease forged onto my lips that attempted to offer them what they wished.  Yet it was a brittle thing, cracks soon enough appearing in the traitorous voice that attempted to soften the croak that came.  I could not look in their eyes now for the pity and sadness that reflected in them, and worse came such inner self-contempt and unworthiness that I could find no comfort in the embraces of word or touch offered.

What was to be two weeks of relaxation and rekindling family ties turned into a nervous day-to-day approximation of whether once returned from where I had come that the other oracles would continue where this one had guided me.  Worse I fear was how I came to view my companion who had travelled to the other side of the world for adventure and exploration, for I could feel nothing more now other then shame and insecurity where even the briefest touch or word of encouragement had my stomach twisting and eyes swell with tears.

A cold chill settled within, whispering with it the knowledge and acceptance that I needed to face the path ahead alone and feared so greatly in hurting him.  However with the uncertainties around the condition why impose problems onto him when he had so much more to do, and when by this stage I feared that my actions, the distance I desired so greatly would have him hurt by rejection.  So I ended it yet took solace in the fact he desired to remain friends and understood my reasoning's.

It has taken this long waiting, watching the storm gather closer and loom always on the edge of sight and never from mind.  Words, fluid and paper crosses hands, yet never the single golden coined response desired from the gypsies that deem I wait another two weeks after the two months it has taken to get to this point in the ridge with the peak standing mockingly out of reach.

I thought myself a patient person until this moment, but there are only so many shrines, so many oracles and so many words that can be used before you just want to hide from them all.